Have to/Choose to

First of all – it’s finals week at work this week!  That means my semester is coming to a close.  One of the reasons I love working at a university is that every 16 weeks I get a new start.  New students, a chance to improve my lessons and try new things.  I love fresh starts. This also means I’ve been back to work 4 1/2 months!  Woah.

Anyway….One of the activities/lessons I’ve done with my students for quite some time now is called “Have to/Choose to” and it’s one I’ve needed to remind myself of and put into practice in my own life a lot lately.

It goes like this…

My students make a list of all the things they HAVE to do.  I leave it pretty vague – could be a to-do list for the day or it could be things they feel they have to do on a regular basis.  My regular basis HAVE to list might look something like this (in no particular order):

I have to cook healthy meals.

I have to lose weight.

I have to read my Bible.

I have to spend quality time with my family.

I have to keep my house clean.

I have to do the laundry (again).

and on an on……

 

In class I have my students read those lists out loud to each other and then I make them add items they hear others say that they also have to do.  As you can imagine it kind of stresses everyone out hearing and thinking about everything on their plate.  It’s how I feel sometimes when I make a to-do list.  And I LOVE to make lists. But sometimes those lists are overwhelming.
Then I have my class re-write their list in a new way.  They change it from “I have to_________.” to “I choose to ________ because/so that _______.” My list would now look like this:

I choose to cook healthy meals so that we can stay healthy and eat together at home on a regular basis.

I choose to lose weight to stay healthy so I feel better about myself.

I choose to read my Bible because it changes my whole perspective on the day and keeps God’s word in my heart.

I choose to spend quality time with my family because we need to make the most of the little time we have.

I choose to keep my house clean so we can enjoy the space we have without added clutter or stress.

I choose to do the laundry so we won’t smell. :)

 

There’s something about that shift…about not demanding to yourself you complete a list of tasks, but realizing the importance of why  you WANT to do the things you set out to do.  And if you get to an item on the list you really don’t want to do, or wouldn’t have chosen it in the first place – Let it go!  Maybe you don’t actually HAVE to create lunch art for your child every day so you can instagram it.  (I stopped taking pictures of Mariah’s lunchbox ages ago – working moms don’t have time for that kind of stuff).

So if you’re like me, maybe you need to take a look at your “have to” list and make it a “choose to” list.  I have to remind myself to shift the list all the time.

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