Tuesday, 9 July 2013
Many people in my life have called me a perfectionist. They’re right. I’ve always liked things to be right the first time around. I don’t like rough drafts, prototypes, or trial runs. I want the to be the BEST the first time around at everything I do. I fear failure and usually won’t try something until I know I can master it. Like when I learned to walk…there was no practicing between parents or toddling around. The first time I walked (at 13 months) I went across the entire room, pivoted and came back. Nailed it. Without any help.
I’ve learned that God doesn’t want me to be perfect. He wants me to need him. To rely on him and trust him. I’m slowly learning how to give up my constant need for control and perfection and rely fully on him. It’s hard to learn and hard to see my imperfections, but I know now God loves me with his unconditional love. I’m learning to embrace the imperfect.
I started Little Miss Imperfect after a stirring in my heart prompted me to write. I felt like the Lord was calling me to share my stories, so I obeyed. I realize there are a million and one mommy blogs out there, and I’ve been one to roll my eyes at the number of them on the interwebs. But I have found over and over again in my life when I roll my eyes at something or say I’ll never do it, God usually ends up leading me to do the very thing I had an attitude about.
I’ve found that writing my stories is therapeutic for me. I’ve kept a journal most of my life and there’s something freeing about letting my jumbled up thoughts and feelings come together, slip out of my mind and land on the page.
So welcome to my therapy sessions….where I think out loud in order to regain my sanity. Feel free to contribute to the conversation and make me feel a little less crazy for talking to myself. If you don’t, I won’t judge….I’m a blog lurker by nature and I don’t mind talking to myself. Knowing you’re crazy is supposed to make you less crazy, right?
When I’m not writing, I’m a mama of two girls ages 8 and 5. I’ve worked full time outside the home twice, stayed home with my girls while running a photography business, and am currently a full time stay at home mama about to leave Italy and gear up for full time RV life. My hubby works from home blogging about cell phones. He’s my rock and calming presence in my life. We live in Northern Italy now, but I grew up in America while my hubby spent his childhood in Rome. We’re learning how to love God and love each other to create our most joyful life.