I’ve been silent here on the world wide web. I’ve crept into a bit of a deep dark hole that I’m having trouble climbing out of. I saw a little light for a day or so, but something pulled me back under again. When I let my emotions get the best of me I can sink down pretty far, but mix that with my lack of sleep that’s been even less this week, I’m feeling pretty stuck.
I wish I would have come here to this space, or even to my own journal, to write it all out and work through it. Because when I start to let my thoughts form into somewhat coherent sentences I usually feel better. There’s something freeing about getting the words onto paper (or the screen).
Instead I kept it all in. I stayed lost in my pity party and simply surfed the internet aimlessly looking for some sort of escape from my mundane life.
That backfired, because scrolling through Instagram, Facebook and Pinterest mindlessly doesn’t do much good you know. You see all the fun and excitement others are having and you feel more like a failure.
But I’m coming back up to the surface again. I can see the light from here. My exhaustion is making it a little foggy, but I know the sun will come out tomorrow (right, Annie?). If I can get myself in the right place for a few minutes, and choose to, I can make the sunshine come out for a bit today too.
That’s what it takes, you know? CHOOSING how you respond to your circumstances in order to create a better and happier life.
Choosing to find the moments in your day that weren’t so bad…the snuggles with your kids, the fall like weather at the end of summer, fluffy clouds and sunshine, baby giggles, painting your fingernails, a glass of wine on the balcony with your hubby…They probably add up to make a pretty good day if you stop to notice them.
Choosing to remember God’s promises that he’ll never give you more than you can handle and that he knows the desires of your heart.
For me it’s those things, plus choosing to actively engage in my life and my family’s life. Instead of sitting on the couch after dinner browsing the internet counting down until bedtime for my girls, I need to take a family walk/bike ride. Instead of thinking about what a horrible sleeper my one and a half year old is, I need to run down a huge hill with her and feel her excitement. I need to have dance parties and tickle fights to make my darkness disappear.
It’s not easy. Not easy at all to get my butt out of the chair or my eyes off my phone.
But when I do, the world (and this mama) are much happier!
What do you do to get out of the funk and bring joy back into your life?
Leave a Reply